Divorce Mediation

As Certified Divorce Mediators, Long Island Best Mediation provide an unbiased and safe environment to help you come to a mutually agreeable divorce and separation settlement. We help you understand all the issues related to divorce and facilitate solutions that work for both spouse and the family. It is through our efforts and yours that we can help you come up with creative solutions that works for everyone

DIVORCE MEDIATION is a process of dissolving a marriage in a non-adversarial way.  Mediation provides both parties the ability to negotiate a settlement they agree on.  Mediation as opposed to litigation means you will be negotiating for what you feel works for you, your spouse and your children.  You are free to consult with a lawyer at any time during the divorce mediation process and some mediation sessions may include a lawyer representing each party, but remember lawyers have learned to try to litigate and fight until they get the best deal possible for their clients instead of working towards an amicable resolution that works for all parties.

During our divorce mediation process a family counselor is present, however the problems of the past are not discussed, but rather addressing the present and restructuring the future is most productive. We do advise if the past problems hinder negotiations then a separate counseling session may be necessary to allow the negotiations to continue in a productive fashion. It’s important to remember that this process calls for mutual respect for all involved.  If you are more interested in winning and you want to fight your spouse, then mediation would not be right for you.  Litigation means all sides lose, mediation means all sides win, including the children.

Too often divorce through litigation is seen as a lose/lose outcome.  Compromise is difficult because each of the attorneys are looking for the best possible outcome for their client neither ever achieves because the judges push for settlement in every area. Divorce Mediation is designed to eliminate the lose/lose concept.  Since the process is mutual, you can’t win at the other’s expense.  Neither can you lose.  Our goal is to come to a settlement that is both acceptable and fair to both parties.  See below comparison between a traditional litigated divorce and a mediated divorce.

Will a Divorce Mediator be Beneficial to My Needs?

When two people decide that they are going to dissolve their marriage, they may be concerned about the nature of their divorce proceedings. Many times, they decide to resolve their differences outside of a courtroom and hire a divorce mediator who can help facilitate everything. If you are unsure of whether or not a divorce mediator may be right for you, read on for some of the beneficial elements that a divorce mediator can provide.

A Divorce Mediator Will Know What Questions to Ask

When you decide to hire a divorce mediator from Nassau County they will begin by asking each member of the couple some key questions to get to know them. The questions that the divorce mediator asks will help them assess the needs and opinions of each party. By asking questions to each person, the couple may also come to better understand the other’s point of view. Both people’s concerns and interests are of value, and the divorce mediator will help both people come to a mutual understanding of that.

Assistance in Understanding The Needs of Each Person

The professional divorce mediators at Long Island Best Mediation have had extensive experience in helping couples achieve a peaceful divorce. The divorce mediator can often help each member of the couple effectively communicate the issues that are causing them to want a divorce. Sometimes the people in the couple do not even realize that certain issues were on the table in the first place. An experienced divorce mediator can help the couple realize these issues in a healthy manner. Depending on what the issues at hand are, the mediator can also recommend further services such as financial experts or attorneys. Throughout the process, the divorce mediator will help each person in the couple understand new viewpoints and to amicably address new issues that arise.

A Communicative Approach

It is not uncommon to meet couples that have issues with effective communication. Sometimes the parties in the divorce exhaust energy and time by blaming each other, or arguing over legal and financial issues. This usually results in conversations that circle around repeatedly and go nowhere. By hiring a divorce mediator, the couple can communicate in a far more effective manner.  The skills that a divorce mediator will teach the couple can also help the parties in their future conversations after the divorce is finalized.

Helping to Bridge the Gap

Oftentimes, a divorcing couple will come to a standstill regarding one or more issues that are pertaining to the divorce. If both parties become stuck in their positions, or think that their way is the only logical resolution, a professional divorce mediator will help bridge the gap of communication. The divorce mediator is to be completely neutral, so they may see the issue at hand as something that will benefit neither member of the couple. When this happens, the divorce mediator can put the issue on hold and suggest that it be dealt with at a later time so it may be handled in a different way or with a fresh approach.

Mediators Move Things Forward

The sensitive and emotional discussions that take place during a divorce are not usually easy or comfortable. Without a proper facilitator, conversations between a divorcing couple have a tendency to become heated, negative, or toxic. These conversations can result in unhealthy communication and more hurt feelings. When a divorce mediator is present, they will be able to help each party move things forward in a healthier manner. They can do this by helping the couple to look ahead, rather than to stay stuck in a dilemma. At this point in the process, new ideas and concerns can be discussed and the parties can shift their focus to forward instead of backward. This technique often helps the parties come to a healthier understanding of each other’s needs and concerns.

Reduction of Legal Costs

Not only is hiring a divorce mediator in Nassau County beneficial in terms of healthy communication, but it can also help the couple save on many fees. It is true that when a divorce mediator is hired, some of the costs go to legal fees for attorneys and other neutral professionals, but that is intended as a resolution to issues as opposed to a court battle. By hiring a divorce mediator, the separating couple can determine the divorce settlement together in a way that will work best for them and their family as opposed to battling things out in a courtroom. The ultimate goal is to provide a healthy road to each party’s new and happier life, and saving money on legal fees is a wonderful way to start. 

How Does Divorce Mediation Work?

The team at Long Island Best Mediation have been helping divorcing spouses for several decades and have become one of Nassau County’s top divorce mediation companies. The professionals here have helped many people resolve differences of a legal, financial, and communicative nature. Once hired, your divorce mediator will start a process of dispute resolution with both parties of the divorce. This process is only a viable option if both parties are open to communicating and negotiating the terms of the divorce. Usually, a mediation process begins with the divorce mediator having a meeting with each spouse, and then all together. At the first group meeting, each party will be able to openly communicate their needs and expectations regarding divorce related issues. Some of these issues commonly include:

  • Division of shared property
  • Custody and visitation of children
  • Alimony
  • Child support

 

The initial meetings will allow the divorce mediator to understand where the couple is in their separation process. The meetings will also allow the mediator to assess what areas each party needs to work on the most. There is typically no limit of time for a divorce mediation process. A couple can continue to mediate and address divorce issues for as long as they all desire. Depending on the nature of the divorce, and the issues at hand, more sessions may be required. 

Upon agreement of all of the couple’s issues, the mediator will draft a divorce settlement agreement. Both members of the couple and their lawyers will review, sign, and present this agreement to the judge for consideration.

Is Divorce Mediation Right for You?

The team at Long Island Best Mediation have been working with people who ask this question for many years. For many couples, hiring a divorce mediator has proven to be the best way to address their issues with little to no conflict. However, divorce mediation will only work if you and your spouse are in agreement on most things. A successful mediation only comes about if couples:

  • Are in agreement to divorce
  • There is no history of domestic violence or abuse
  • Both parties are transparent about financial matters
  • Both parties are open to discussing custody of children

 

However, divorce mediation may still be successful after a period of several sessions that address the above concerns. It is not uncommon for a divorcing couple to change their point of view after some time of healthy communication with a mediator.

If you and your spouse are considering a divorce, or if you would like to know more about the divorce mediation process in Nassau County, please contact Long Island Best Mediation today. We are here to help you and your spouse achieve a healthier understanding of each other, and fulfill your independent happiness.

Divorce Litigated

Estimated cost - $20,000

Divorce Mediated

Estimated cost - $3,000

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